Hoodwinked

Foreward

I made an adventure out to see Hoodwinked this weekend. It wasn't the most unpleasant movie experience I had, but it doesn't rank up there.

T and I decided to bring her psuedo-neices J (5 years) and B (3 years) along to the movies w/ us. First off, their bed time is 8. The movie started at 7:40. Perhaps that should have been a warning flag. Oddly enough, very few of my problems about the experience were with the children (But more on that later).

We leave Mommy's (We can call her R) house ~6:30. Before we are at the end of the street, B starts saying "Wait, you forgot mommy, you forgot mommy." T said "Mommy isn't coming." After some conversation, T made B decide whether to come to the movies w/ us or stay home w/ Mommy. She decided to come along. This is the first time she went to the movies w/o Mommy.

This is a theatre I've never been to before; it is on the top floor (3rd floor) of a mall. We parked at the bottom, and entered through Burlington Coat Factory. All of a sudden, T says she forgot her phone and runs back to the car leaving me to watch two kids. I survived.

We traversed through the mall w/ two kids up to the theatre. Hey, People do it all, but most of them are parents. It wasn't too bad, though. The line was around the corner. I have never seen a movie line that long before, and I saw Episode 1 on opening day. Looking at my watch, it's roughly 7. Still plenty of time to get into the theatre before the movie starts, but we'll probably miss the "golden seats" in the center. ( Yes, I count rows). One must forgive these little luxurious when dealing with kids.

Anyway, the line moves fairly quickly (for its length) and J asks about popcorn as we trudge into the theatre. I told her that we should get in, then I'll come back out and get popcorn. It's about 7:25 (movie starts in 15 minutes). We get in right away (no line at the ticket booth) and take seats. First word out of J's mouth is "you said you'd get popcorn." so, I grab a ticket stub from T and go out to get popcorn (and something to drink).

I, inadvertently, get in a deserted line. We're not sure what happened to the attendant, from what I gathered he just left the line after serving one customer, leaving others waiting. Maybe it was a bathroom emergency. I was too far back to notice. The line moved up because people were leaving it, but I was oblivious. Finally, two people in front of me someone starts throwing a fit about not being waited on. A manager started waiting on people.

Around this time I realize I'm not sure what drinks are 'suitable' for children drinking and give T a cell call. It goes right to voicemail because she already turned the phone off (she doesn't want to get lynched by other movie goers). To make things simple, I order a "Number 1" which is a large popcorn and 2 medium sodas. I figure T can take 1 soda and I'll take the other, and the popcorn can sit between the two kids.

The large popcorn was bigger than the smaller child (who actually doesn't like popcorn, so I didn't need to buy any under the guise that she may want some). The medium sodas felt like the equivalent to 2 liters of soda.

While getting the food, I realize that the line to get into the theatre went from 2 people to 200 people. It was 7:39 now (one minute till showtime) and I just went up to the front and walked on through. No one questioned me.

Ts eyes bugged out when I got back with the food. J was happy to see me. Some soda spilled on me as I sat down (one of the cups was overflowing) and that put me in a bit of a sour mood. We were sitting "Me, B, J, T". I said, lets move so the popcorn is between the children, and the movie started. I handed the popcorn to J, a soda to T and sat down. A few minutes into the movie we actually did try to move the children. The kids don't know how to speak in "quiet" voices yet, so that was a bit problematic, but we did it. B was entranced in the animation and not paying attention to anything.

Somewhere in the middle of the movie T tried to cut off J and B from popcorn and Soda. J (the older one) accepted it, but I thought B was going to have a crying fit during the movie. For the first time in my life, I was the party ruining it for everyone else.

At least twice during the movie, a usher came in (with flashlight) and walked through the theatre. I think he was looking for movie hoppers.

Overall, I survived...

Overview

The basic plot of the movie; for those that don't know, is the story of Little Red Riding Hood. Grandma, the woodsman, little red, and the wolf. This is the story behind the story, as the police detective discovers (after responding to a domestic disturbance call). The 'new part' of the story is that someone is stealing recipes throughout the forest, and Grandma's recipes are next on the list. All the restaurants are closing down as their recipes vanish.

These four characters are caught in the story, and it all comes together at the end in a predictable way (well, it was predictable to me, I'm not sure if J understood it; to B it was probably just animated pictures)

Style Cartoons, cartoons, cartoons, cartoons. The animation was a wonder. The songs were funny and helped tell the story. A Ben Folds performance of "Red is Blue" was in the middle (he didn't write the song, just recorded it for the movie). It was a catchy song and really hit the spot. J didn't understand why Red was Blue and I had to explain a bit (in the middle of the movie)

Girl Factor T enjoyed it.

Watch it Again When it comes out on video, I look forward to seeing it in the comfort of my own home; I bet there were a lot of jokes that I just missed.